Them on Us

Monday, November 23, 2009

By Jake Nichols

He did it all – Cliff Hansen: Teton County commissioner, Wyoming governor, U.S. senator and rancher. When a posse of armed cowboys faced off with feds over grazing rights in Grand Teton National Park, Hansen was there, six-shooter at his hip.

We caught the PBS special featuring the late Cliff Hansen last Friday night. In addition to all the achievements in the political realm, perhaps the most telling indication of what kind of man Cliff was came from the program’s executive producer, Geoff O’Gara.

“I was a young reporter in Washington, D.C., when I first met Senator Cliff Hansen, and he made an immediate impression,” O’Gara said. “To use a word journalists rarely use when describing politicians – he carried himself with a natural dignity.”

Cowboy-fringed lawyer mounts a high horse

You know the joke: What’s the only difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead trial lawyer in the road? There were skid marks in front of the skunk.

Stereotyped by their late night commercials offering victims of asbestos-related injuries big settlement money, they’re the reason costs have skyrocketed for insurance, medical care, and coffee. The first dimwit to spill a cup of hot coffee on his lap, only to find out it burns, is now a millionaire. Trial lawyers are also to blame for the warning labels-gone-wild. Your new toaster comes with a warning: “Caution, do not operate in bathtub.”

So where does Gerry Spence get off with his comment made last year at the Consumer Attorneys of California convention? The lawyer love-fest is taking place this week at San Francisco’s swankiest digs, The Fairmont. Last year’s lifetime achievement award went to Spence even after he blurted that “trial lawyers belong to the noblest profession in America.” Say what?

“We have to redefine who we are: We are the most important people in America,” Spence said at the time. “There is no other profession in America that fights for freedom, that fights for what America is about, that fights for justice for ordinary people.”

And it gets better … or worse.

“I want to ask you which would be more important: If all of the doctors in the country somehow disappeared or all the trial lawyers in America somehow disappeared?” he pondered. “We can live without medical care, but we cannot live without justice.”

I’ll bet a fiddle of gold against your soul ‘cause I think I’m better than you…

Our favorite fiddlin’ man, Tim Hodgson, who can be seen nightly all summer long with the Bar J Wranglers, fiddled his face off but faced some tough competition last month. Hodgson competed in the Grand Master Fiddler Championships held in Nashville. The event featured musicians from across the U.S., Canada, the Czech Republic, and Japan.

Hodgson ended up placing in the top 20. First prize was awarded to Alex Hargreaves of Corvallis, Ore. We read the wrap up in the Chattanoogan.

Thanks for the typo

Monday’s headline in the sports section of the New York Daily News ran, “TCU's win over No. 16 Wyoming makes case that Horned Frogs are one of nation's best teams.” While we love the compliment, the Pokes are, admittedly, not ranked this year. It’s been quite some time since a Wyoming football was ranked in the nation’s top 20.

The News meant to write “Utah,” who was pummeled by the undefeated Horned Frogs. The Cowboys can enjoy the error for a little while until TCU comes to Laramie this weekend to exact their revenge. Gulp!

Show us the money

Aha! TOU editors caught some old geezer cashing in on our fame. Provincetown Advocate columnist Jackson Lambert just celebrated his 90^th birthday at the VFW in Cape Cod. Apparently, Lambert has been penning a whacked-out, stream-of-consciousness column called “Jackson Hole” since the ‘70s … and we’ve yet to receive any residuals.

We tried to read the thing, but the Advocate has some sophisticated registry process that involves surrendering credit card info and we suddenly became less interested. Happy birthday, Jackson.

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