Politics

Computer Cops

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

By Jake Nichols

Thaw well that ends well
Jackson HOle, Wyo.-Lisa daCosta had a point; it was just the wrong one.

“We are pumping, what, 300 million gallons of water into Flat Creek annually to keep it from [freezing and] flooding? Water heated by one million kilowatt hours.”
Speaking out as a concerned citizen, daCosta railed on about the folly of the TOJ’s never-ending, ever-spending battle with the puny crick that ate Jackson.
The current plan involves pumping warm water into the ice floes from four thaw wells around town.

“And now, with the discovery of benzene at Rocky Mountain Bank, I’m worried about drawing more water out of the aquifer that might make the benzene show up faster.”

Mayor Mark Barron agreed that thaw wells were undoubtedly headed for retirement someday soon, but the matter at hand was a discussion over a drinking water well not a thaw well. With the town poised to snatch up a quarter-million in free money, council members were ready to slam dunk the decision to award a bid for the photovoltaic project at Well No. 5 in Karns Meadow. Low bidder ($144,287) was a Lander-based firm called Creative Energies LLC. They promised to use no subcontractors and the town promised to refund the balance of the $250,000 back to Obama’s stimulus plan.

CSI Silicon Valley
Remember, on all the old cop shows in the ‘70s, a detective with a ghastly tie and horrific haircut sat behind a desk, bored, taking down the particulars of a victim’s complaint?

“He was about five-nine and squirrely-looking … the next thing I knew, my watch was gone.”

“Uh-huh. Is that all you can remember? Think, now.”

Man, that was so yesterday. Cop shops nowadays don’t waste time paying dicks to file criminal reports. Not with today’s budget issues, anyway. Sgt. Steve Saez petitioned the Town for $16,000 so JPD could set themselves up with a fancy computer cop that could ask if “that was all you could remember.”

The software, called Coplogic, is essentially an online form that tourists can fill out when they return home and find out they were ripped off while in Jackson – presumably right after they get the itemized credit card bill from Four Seasons. The inputted information would then be uploaded to a nationwide database of ripped-off people, assisting law enforcement agencies everywhere in catching serial fake-Rolex salesmen.

Some Council members did not grow up in the Computer Age. Councilman Bob Lenz grew up in the No. 2 pencil Era. “How does it work?” he asked like a thawed out caveman looking for the hidden wires attached to a cell phone.

Sgt. Saez explained the gist of the technology. Other council members wondered if the system couldn’t be exploited by fraud. What was to keep every tourist from claiming the chambermaid swiped their Blackberry and collecting insurance without ever having to sweat it out, chain-smoking in front of the good-cop, bad-cop routine:

“How do you KNOW you didn’t drop it in the airport bathroom stall?”
Eventually, the Council agreed to allow JPD to move into the 21st Century, especially after hearing some of the money would come from yet another federal grant.

Like money in the bank
The Town of Jackson is making the switch … to the Bank of Jackson Hole. After the takeover of Jackson State Bank & Trust by Wells Fargo, Jackson’s sole remaining local bank is BOJH. And town officials opted to ‘keep it local,’ choosing BOJH as the town’s official banker. That would have been lucrative news about a year ago, before the economic collapse dredged town coffers. TOJ last put out their bank services contract to bid in 2002. The new agreement is for three years with a two-year extension option. Wells Fargo and First Interstate also bid, but town staffers liked BOJH’s user-friendly Web site and preferred the bank’s lower costs. JHW
PERMALINK:
Computer Cops | Planet JH News Article: Council Chronicles

Reader Comments

Hey, during tough times ... I have an idea! How about we spend $250,000 (of money taken from producers)on new signs and another $400,000 (of money taken from producers) on a tunnel for bicycles to ride through? Hey producers, isn't it about time to shrug?
SOH

Friendship is a universal human right. I don't have enough friends. Dear government, please take some of the friends that other people have earned and give them to me! I am sickened by these capitalist pig nice people who have friends around them all the time and no one wants to be with me. Please provide me with friends!
SOH

Stop complaining about federal grant money soh; it is free. It is not like it comes from anyone. Even your GOP party knows that everyone shouold try to get as much free money from the feds FOR Wyoming as possible!
Dianne Garrimman

Boy, DG, I hope you're not being serious. While the GOP and the Democrats in congress may just be the biggest hypocrites on planet Earth, that's no reason for the public to support irrational special-interest deficit spending. I, for one, have had enough of the "Get what's not yours while you can and screw everybody else" school of thinking.
eyeson jackson

$16,000 for some software to take complaints online and upload them to a national database! The JPD and the taxpayers have just been the victim of theft. Put that in the Coplogic database! Total waste of money during a recession. I can't believe the town continues to complain about the tight budget while spending money on such unnecessary line items.
eyeson jackson



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